the garrison show

i’ll end my time in beijing with a few last observations.

the city is being destroyed. i mean literally demolished. much of this has to do with renovation for the olympics and the rest of it has to do with simple modernization, but the effect is all the same. there is construction everywhere and there are are debris and rubble everywhere else. whole city blocks are nothing but makeshift landfills until they can be cleared and built over. as sites are excavated to prepare for skyscraper foundations, tombs and ancient cultutural sites are being discovered. then they’re being looted and destroyed. the smithsonian, EPA, historical society and archeological restrictions are all completely unknown. china is simply uninterested in its past as the price of being consumed by its future.

mao is everywhere. it’s almost nauseating how far the chinese will go to get the chairman’s likeness on some kitsch. he’s on flags, t-shirts, watches, banners, kites, books, shoes, jackets, maps, guns and food. it’s weird.

finally, i went to the military museum and was a little creeped out. i think the extraordinary celebration of military equipment and feats hints at the reason why mankind’s history is plagued with violence. we give parades for it. we watch it, read it, hear about it, sing it and play with it. the image of the chinese children playing with the fake automatic weapons in the gift store was haunting and will stay with me. i only wish i could say that our culture was any better.

i will miss some things about being unemployed. the ability to sleep in till 11:00, to stay up till 4:00, to spend a day watching movies, reading a book, or writing a short story, to visit long-lost friends in faraway places, to dream of vacations i could take (but never actually do), and just generally fart around in my underwear for far too long. well, hopefully i will miss them.

i think i will be coming up on a dilemma that i might as well start thinking about now. i’m hoping that i’ll miss all those above perks because i think i’m getting close to the end of two applications, which if everything goes as planned, will result in two comparable offers. both of which, i cannot accept. thus the choice.

option #1 involves technical consulting for a pretty large company. i’d be in the government group, most likely stationed in DC (which is exactly where i want to be) but with no guarantees but also the opportunity to travel most places in the world. the work could at times be interesting, but could prove in the long run to be mundane. think officespace, although i have reason to believe it won’t be nearly that bad. i have a good number of friends who work for this company and though i wouldn’t expect to work with them, i’ve gotten a generally very positive review. even though i’ve been teaching high school for the last three years (which is my job-holding record), i feel like this is going back down my real career path. in 3-5 years, i’m doing much the same thing, unless i get bitten by the entrepreneurial bug.
option #2 seems more divergent to me. i would be doing education research and helping write standardized math tests. it seems i would have two primary responsibilities: (1) write and review test items and (2) statistically measure and analyze the validity and reliability of existing tests and test items. this may be more intellectually stimulating and i may be able to get a free graduate degree out of it. if so, this would provide direction for my career. i could see myself getting a degree either in statistics or cognitive psychology. both of those are fascinating to me and could lead down really interesting roads.

the first option will probably do better financially, unless you account for graduate school tuition with option #2. my instinct says option #2 might be more interesting, but i could be wrong about that.

what am i missing? what do you think? what should i do?

and where should i take my last vacation?

so i’m trying to help my parents clean out their basement (which has been buried in stuff for all of recent memory) and i came across a shoebox full of some of my old toys. sweet!

here’s the thing, though. i was going through the box trying to decide what to keep and what to toss, and every damn piece of plastic in that box was a gun, cannon, missile, bomb, rocket, laser, or some combination of the previous, i.e. a laser-guided rocket gun. what gives?

i’m not the first nor the smartest person to notice this, but i did notice it. is it any wonder that we solve international conflicts with an army? is there a better way?

mark cuban posted a challenge on his blog: fix the movie industry.

it’s dying - people are waiting for DVD’s, movies are more expensive than people think they’re worth, and they perceive quality decrease. so how do we fix that?

personally, i think there’s a lot of value in a different model for theaters. right now we’re in the age of the multiplex. cater to everyone, offer as many movies as you can. i commented to mark that a themed, branded theater that catered to action flicks, or dramas or date movies might be more successful. team it with a bar and restaurant and make it a destination regardless of what’s playing. give me a fun place to hang out that also has 4 screens playing a variety of genre flicks and i’ll just go with my friends and if i want to see a movie, i will.

i’m the smartest cookie. now it’s just a race to see who will give me a movie theater first!!

damn, this trip just keeps getting better and better.

i was apprehensive about a 3-day, 2-night self-guided tour on an island with 9 strangers for all the obvious reasons. the backpacker culture is a strange one; in some ways it’s a throwback to the early 20’s and its collegiate debauchery but at the same time there’s a thirst for “authentic” experiences which is refreshing. i’ll probably post again about this as i reflect more on it…

in any case, the scenery on the island is top-notch. from lake mckenzie to wabby lake to the shipwreck to indian’s head, there’s tons to see and 3 days isn’t nearly enough time. it’s not a small island either, so we spent a lot of time just in our 4-wheeler, driving around on the beach from place to place.

the gang consisted of a bloke from Glasgow who was nearly as sarcastic as i am, a couple girls from Canada, a few chaps from Ireland and a trio from England. i was definitely the odd man out as the sole american. we quoted Anchorman religiously and enjoyed ourselves enormously.

the one bizarre caveat here was the behavior of our campsite host, wayne, an aboriginal. historically, the aboriginals have had serious problems with alcohol because their metabolism and body chemistry is so different. in most parts of australia, it’s illegal to serve more than one drink to aboriginal in fact. that’s part of the reason it’s somewhat troubling to hear wayne exhorting us all to “get fucked up.”

cultures that exist in such proximity–as the white and the aboriginal do–are bound to spill into each other. i just wish it was a little more reciprocal and not just a one-way adoption of all the worst aspects of western culture. the aboriginals can do so much better than mcdonald’s and budweiser; i wish we would learn something from them instead of the other way around…

i’m hooked. where to begin…

first, the crew. we had a new skipper and first mate on our second trip. mel, the captain, is also the owner of the fleet and sailing company. he’s been on the water for more years than i’ve been alive - almost twice as many. he’s got a story and a scenario for every occasion and is an absolutely fantastic teacher. he was knowledgeable (to put it mildly), perceptive and patient. more about this in a bit. will, another english bloke, was the first mate. he was seriously infected with the racing bug after coming out of a life of airplanes and military service. he knew his stuff cold and was eager to answer questions. with these two guys manning the boat, we couldn’t help but learn.

next, the passengers. i admit i was a little hesitant about starting this whole thing over with 10 new people but my fears evaporated when i saw the tremendous quantities of alcohol that the next group brought on board. there were 3 canadian guys and 4 english dudes and between them, i’m not exaggerating, there were over 120 cans of beer and probably 12 liters of wine. after 3 days, it was all gone. turns out, there’s no inappropriate time or place for beer. who knew? i think that’s probably all i need to say about that.

the actual course was fantastic. mel covered sail theory (how the wind moves the boat), meteorology, navigation, chart reading, parts of the boat and the actualy mechanics of how to sail. i’m now adept at “taking on the port running backstay” and “easing off the headsail sheet.” it’s a totally new vocabulary. the only thing that really hung me up (can you feel the pun coming?) was trying to hoist the main sail–a sheet of fabric that weighs more than i do–up 120 feet of mast. i’ll have to hit the gym when i get back to the states.

the last bit of good news occured when we were getting ready to disembark. mel pulled me over to sign my logbook and told me that if i got back to the whitsundays sometime, he would put me on his boats as a volunteer while i really learned to sail. he would host me for 4 weeks while i ate and slept on different boats and lent a hand as a crew member. so if i get back to australia, i’ve got a free 4-week vacation on the water. total score. who’s coming with me??

final note: regarding the offspring of interracial reltaionships, taiwanese + swedish = gorgeous.

i just completed the first half of my 5-day sailing adventure. it was badass to say the least.

we were on a 60-ft racing yacht, the Eureka II. when i say racing, i do mean racing. top speed during a race in sydney was 25 knots. that’s lethal fast. the skipper told us some stories about getting their heads torn off by flying booms, being crushed against the deck by 20-foot waves and having their hands burned off holding on to cables. i, on the other hand, survived quite heartily. looks like i was born to be a sailer… i think we got up to 10 knots once.

highlights of the sail included the BEAUTIFUL whitehaven beach (pix to be uploaded in a few days), the almost-as-beautiful french doll (whose name we could never quite remember), two 18-year old english crazy girls, the crew–glenn-o and chris-o, an english bloke named ian, and a card game called shithead (i realized a few days after i learned how to play, it’s actually a variation of asshole…which somehow makes sense).

we snorkeled a couple times, drank a lot of wine out of bags, and played hours of cards. it was some serious fun and good bonding. i may have to visit ian in london and if i’m back down under, chris-o is on my list of people to call. i can’t email him because he’s barely literate. it’s all he can do to get his clothes on facing the right way. sometimes his mom helps. i hope he’s reading this.

cheers!

well, holy shit.

diving is amazing. really–amazing.

i started out with two days in a classroom and a (thankfully heated) pool. we learned you should never hold your breath underwater (cause your lungs can explode) and how to breathe through a regulator (don’t use your nose). we practiced swimming with fins and the tank and just got used to moving around underwater (it’s sort of like being an astronaut). but none of that could have prepared me for what it’s like in the ocean. at the reef. with the fish. and the sharks.

breathtaking.

monday morning we pile on SeaQuest, the ship that will take us out to OceanQuest, the ship that’s permanently moored out on the reef that we sleep on. It’s an 90-minute ride in a fast boat out to the reef and the sea was angry that day. unfortunately, i blew chunks on the way over, about 3 minutes before we got there. whoops! got some on the boat, too. sorry. it’s not my fault.

we finally get there and we get suited up (there’s a lot of gear in scuba) and jump in the water straightaway. after my vomitus eposide, i was hoping i might get a breather before we actually started one of the deadliest hobbies in the world, but no rest for the weary. we were on board about 10 minutes before we all took the giant step off the boat, weighed down about 35 pounds from the tank and ancillary appurati…

from the second your sightline gets under the surface, it’s just amazing. from what you see to what you feel, there’s no way to convey the changes in perception that occur. immediately you become aware of the fact that you’re breathing - underwater. at first that’s sort of all you can think about but after 20 or 30 seconds that fades away and you start to be more aware of what’s around you. the shape and texture of the coral, the colors of the fish you see all over… it’s a real visual feast. you can’t appreciate all the things that are going on right below the water until you see it. and we were only in 18 meters of water!

i ended up with 8 dives and one at night. i’m a PADI-certified adventure diver and i can’t wait to do get under the water again. hopefully i can find some cool sites in the states to check out - if not, cozumel, mexico is not that far away…

okay, the only thing cool that i did in port douglas was check out this rainforest walk led by an aboriginal medicine man. insane.

the damn aboriginals know (or maybe knew) EVERYTHING about the rainforest. white people would be so murdered within 15 minutes. as we’re walking along the path in the pouring down rain, this guy’s pointing out 5 different plants and trees that would kill you if you touched their sap, leaves, bark, or looked at them funny. he has nothing to fear, though, because next he showed us the 3 different plants that you could create antitoxins from.

“if you get bit by a taipan snake, here’s the one you use to flush the wound with.”

“if you get bit by an hourglass spider, this is what you crush up and grind into the wound.”

“if you cheat on your taxes, this weed will make the IRS forget about you.”

seriously - there’s a plant for everything. there’s one that turns into soap, one that you wash your clothes in, and one that gives you smooth, supple skin. white people would probably try to eat that one. i bought a book about the plants, so if you’re curious, ask me what’s up.

and that was the highlight of port douglas. it did not stop raining - there was one tourgroup that went up into the rainforest and then couldn’t get down because the damn roads had flooded. all four of them.

i bet an aboriginal could find a plant to fix that.

as i get ready to go to bed on my last night in sydney, i’m thinking about my almost two weeks here.

it has been interesting to say the least. i had to learn about myself as a person and as a traveler. as most of you know, my situation had changed from when i booked my flight to when i actually arrived, which forced me to re-evaluate some priorities.

sydney is where i partied until 3 in the morning and vomitted the next day. it’s also where i spent countless hours roaming the city streets, not having any particular destination and simply trying to enjoy the journey.

sydney is where i hung out with a 7-year old and played Crash Bandicoot until i thought my thumb would fall off. it’s where we went exploring on rocks and i was reminded how easily children are entertained and how envious i am of it.

sydney is where i wandered into a handful of museums and discovered Aboriginal paintings and writings. i also found heaps of friendly people eager to give directions and advice on finding a good pub.

sydney is where i won $200 in a casino at a game i didn’t even want to play and wound up having a conversation with a math teacher from san fran. i was bemused and baffled by buses and trains and thankful to be able to walk to most places.

sydney was where i had to say goodbye to parts of my past that i was in love with.

and sydney was where i had to move on.

this saturday i saw romeo and juliet at the opera house. it was absolutely fantastic.

it was modern-setting, classic text. it was hip and edgy and i thought it really brought out the best elements of the play. for example, when romeo and crew go to the capulet ball, they are dressed at batman, the joker, and krusty the klown. funny.

it really got me into shakespeare. i actually want to decorate my house with some lines done in calligraphy and framed. how dorky am i?

someone reply with something intelligent.

played a friendly, $10 game of poker last night with three other people.

thought i was in the money for sure when after the first three hands i took out two people. first hand, no action, small bet, fold. second hand, i’m big blind, i flop a straight, someone goes all-in on 2 pair, i call, no-brainer. third hand, i get bullets. i go all-in and the guy holding top pair calls. so i’m looking at a ton of chips ready to make some moves.

it didn’t turn out well, but at least it didn’t take long. we really didn’t “play” much; just all-in’s back and forth until we both had hands we felt like playing.

australian people are cool.

i met matt and teesha for dinner last night and caught up (which was very good). we ended the evening in the Star City casino, the only one in sydney. it is populated largely by asians. and by largely i mean exclusively.

we wanted to sit at a poker table and play some hands and see what we got but the $5/$5 no-limit tables had a $200 minimum buy-in which was a little more than we were prepared to lose. so we sat at a 3-card poker table instead.

matt tapped out within the first twenty minutes - sorry. i was still at the stupid table 4 hours later. i ended up sitting next to a high school math teacher from san francisco!! what are the odds? we chatted about teaching, cards and money. great fun.

in the end, i managed to turn my $50 investment into $250! at highest, i was around $300 but when i dropped down at 1:30 in the morning, i figured it was time to call it off.

all in all, it was way too easy. i see how it could become a habit. i’m not addicted, but i’m interested. maybe i’ll go back…

i went into a library last night. i can hear you all now - “you’re on vacation, why are you in a library??” but it’s MY vacation and i wanted to go into a library so stuff it!

anyway, the point is that books are another place where the US and australia are radically different. for example, they think science fiction actually qualifies as fiction. they lump it in there with all the rest, and they seem to like it quite a bit. if you’re a trekkie, you need to relocate down under and find some social acceptance.

books are also ridiculously expensive. a frickin’ paperback at borders (yes, they have borders) is like $30!! there aren’t any presses here so all the books have to get shipped and you sure do end up paying for it.

okay, enough with the book talk. i’m going back to surfing and drinking and smashing australian women.

right.

a week ago, hooper and i went down to georgia to see what was the deal with housing. i’ve been debating between a cheap apartment, a condo and a house. it looks like we found a place.

new construction, 3-bedroom townhouse with a garage/basement. all told, it’s going to come out to be around $145,000. which is a lot of damn money, but virtually free compared to the DC market. if i had all the time in the world (or i thought that people actually read this blog), i would make an amusing list of other things that cost $145,000. the list would make you laugh, you would have a nicer day and i would somehow be responsible for that in a small way.

but i have no time and the three people that read my posts already know how funny i am. so i’ve got nothing to prove.

i did try to upload a video i made of the inside of the place to google. i’m still playing around trying to figure out the best way to post video to the blog. what do you think?

and that’s why i’m interested in real estate. my latest kick (as of this weekend) is a new-construction condo in SE Washington. koon, blair and i were wandering around the city and we stumbled onto this opportunity right by the site of the new baseball stadium.

we’re talking about $300,000+ for a luxury 2 BR condo that, for the next 2-3 years, is uncomfortably close to the ghetto but in 5-10 years could double in value. i like doubling my money.

the other complicating factor is that very soon i will not live in or near DC. the logistics of buying and then renting a luxury condo are not really appealing. that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it, though. just a healthy pause for thought.

i also found this site for condo news and this one for information on the SE area development. cheers!

in case you were worried that we had solved the problem of education, fear no more. reformers often call for improved “teacher quality,” and while they balk at defining ‘quality’ (they typically don’t mention bust size), they are not shy of stressing its importance. they usually end up saying professional organizations need to define and enforce quality control. gee, thanks.

you see, overacheivers need outlets: doctors have the AMA, lawyers have the ABA; we teachers have the NBPTS. arguably, the AMA makes better doctors and the ABA makes better lawyers. however, a study just came out this week that shows the NBPTS does NOT make better teachers.

it’s really easy to make a bad teacher. imagine someone who hates kids, is relatively incompetent and completely self-absorbed. i could be the poster-child of bad teacherdom. what this study tells me is that it’s really hard to put that bad teacher through some sort of process and improve their teaching ability. the NBPTS is the most rigorous and involved process there is, so if that doesn’t do it (and evidently it don’t), then nothing can. i wonder if we’re in trouble here…

the study (which was featured in Ed Week which I can’t link to because you have to be a member…) is not without its criticims, to be fair. all the teachers and students involved were in north carolina. perhaps it’s not the most repsentative sample you could imagine, but no matter. it’s hip to be square.

i’ll try to be funnier in my next post. thanks for hanging in there…

i’ve definitely got a new tuesday night tradition: quizzo in capitol hill.

you’ve got about 60 people in a bar room playing a trivia game in teams so you know that you’ve got some similar values. for example, you can make a star trek joke (not that i would do something like that) and count on someone laughing. this is not generally true anywhere else, of course.

so we get there (late, cause i suck at life and finding my way around the capitol) and the game is already underway. we saddle up to a table with a couple of empty spots and immediately start trying to look like we know what we’re doing. we must not have been too good at it because about 40 seconds later, the dude sitting next me asks, “so this is your first time?” we answered in the affirmative and became adopted by their team.

i was stoked by how friendly and welcoming the crowd was; when you get smart people together, smart things happen. met a few exchange students, a couple interns, and saw some cute capitol hill tail. i’ll be back. who’s with me?

did i say “every day?” i meant “whenever convenient.”

it turns out i’m not as creative as i wanted to be. so i will have to wait for inspiration to strike, like a doddering old man trying to down that last shot of whiskey before the muscular, midnight black-skinned bartender with a shaved head and mysterious, dark eyes kicks him out like bartender kicking out a drunk.

…where did that come from?

it strikes me upon re-reading my simile that the two things i was trying to compare, my wait for inspiration and a drunk trying to take a shot, arereally nothing alike. despite a slightly lowered self-esteem, i will let the simile stand as written as a testament to bad writing.